Winners: Curt Hawkins and Tyler Reks
They celebrate in the ring, as Cole's horrid commentary continues. I'm thinking about muting this. Matthews plugs Maxine and Curtis's wedding once more. We go to commercial.
We go to the Raw Rebound after Matthews thanks Switchfoot for the Royal Rumble theme song, "Dark Horses." The Rebound showcases the end of the main event, with Foley coming out, and finishing the match with Mr. Socko. It then shows Laurinaitis reversing the decision and Punk exploding on him afterwards with some of his best mic work to date. They then show Laurinaitis's best mic work to date, following it up with a shot to Foley. That was such an amazing segment, and a very well-made video to go along with it.
Back to NXT, Cole with some non-heel commentary about Raw. We need more of that. We see the ring being prepared for the wedding. The wedding is next, but first, more commercials.
Back from the break, the ring is set up, I guess. To quote Cole, "It looks like toilet paper hanging off a tree on Halloween." I agree. An Elvis song plays, and none other than Matt Striker comes out dresses as the King of Rock and Roll. Cole makes some distasteful jokes about how Elvis died, as Striker jives into the ring. In the ring, Striker sings a little, and panders to the crowd. He says it only took five minutes for him to get his license, and thanks Carrot Top for that. Johnny Curtis comes out first, wearing a leather jacket, and being accompanied by some guy who looks like he was just hanging around with Evan Bourne doing what Evan does in his free-time. Cole asks for his gong, and I kinda' wish it was there too. Striker with some more horrible mic work as Maxine comes out to "Here Comes the Bride." If Maxine's dress was any shorter, she'd have trouble coverin her belly-button. Cole says this is a White-trash wedding. Maxine asks who the guy with Curtis is, and Curtis says that it's Chad, but the guys corrects him and says it's Chris. Please tell me this fool and I don't share the same name. Curtis says he's "legit," and Maxine says to just go through with this. Striker in his horrible Elvis voice sings out the marital pledge as Cole boos on commentary. He says until you get bored instead of "til death do us part." He asks if anyone objects and the crowd goes nuts. Striker then talks in his regular voice and sounds shocked that no one objects. Back to the Elvis voice, he continues, but Derrick Bateman comes out and says this must end. Cole's commentary is pretty funny here because he's burying this show more than I am. Bateman says he knows Maxine dumped him because of that email he sent to Teddy Long saying Maxine belonged here, but he didn't send it, Curtis did. They're both screaming at the top of their lungs as Curtis says Bateman's embarrassing himself. Bateman says he has concrete evidence and tells the titantron to roll it. We see a security camera, and Curtis walks into the Bateman's locker room, opens his locker, which is fulled with pictures of Maxine, and uses Bateman's iPad to send an email. He says if Maxine's done with him, then he's fine. She asks if it's true, and Curtis says he's on his way to the top, and Maxine's coming with him. He wants to make her feel good, but Maxine slaps him instead. Curtis then tackles Bateman and they go at it. Cole's going nuts, but sarcastically. He compares this to Mayweather-Pacquiao, and Maxine grabs Curtis allowing Bateman to slam him down. Bateman takes off his shirt halfway, but still has a tie on, and says to Maxine that he always wanted her on top. Maxine tells him to wait, as he was leaving. The crowd is actually cheering Bateman on. Maxine slaps him, then kisses him as the crowd chants. Classical music plays as they make out. Closing words from Cole before the show goes off air: "This is horrible."
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