Back on the air, Sheamus is firing on all cylinders until ADR slows his roll with a DDT. Looks like ADR has the United States championship won but Sheamus kicks out at the two-count. After gaining the upper hand, Sheamus gets ADR backed into the corner and beats his chest a whole bunch as the audience counts along. Neither guy can seal the deal after trading submission moves and a host of convincingly tough-looking blows both ways. It's the Brogue Kick that ends this one once and for all and Sheamus keeps the strap.
Meanwhile back in the WWE Universe, the Rhodes brothers cut a cosmically creepy promo and things get a tad more tangible with an interview segment featuring Roman Reigns. Reigns says he's going to keep his distance from tonight's main event so that he retains a spot in the Battleground main event. He's going to be cool, just like Yolanda in Pulp Fiction. We can dig it. Cole and JBL talk about the WWE Network again (not that I'm keeping track) and then the SmackDown production crew rolls a recap of Daniel Bryan's verbal fisticuffs with with Bo Dallas. And now, it's magic time as Bo Dallas himself is front and center on your televisions. He says he's going to win the Battleground battler royal for "Little Daniel." That's actually really, really funny. Dallas tells everyone to "BO-Lieve" and he walks to the ring as we have commercial sign.
Bo Dallas fights Diego for some reason that likely involves the verb "squash." Hopefully it's the verb, because if it involved the noun, that'd just be weird. It's kind of a weird match, really. Torito is outside but he's apparently dropped in status from comic relief to scenery for this bout. Post-match, Bo engages in a bit of funny business with Torito before slamming the little guy in the center of the ring and walking down the ramp with a great big smile on his face and a clear imprint of Diego's palm across his chest.
More recapping now as we're looking at Monday's return of The Miz followed by the latest resurrection of Y2J. Things go from lighthearted to serious when the Wyatts come down to snuff out the super-happy fun-time mood. Jericho is coming up next to tell us all what's the what.
Y2J gets a standing ovation as he proclaims that this is his first time on SmackDown in a year. Man, that was like another lifetime ago, wasn't it? I mean, gas was still the same price but WWE was worth like a billion dollars back then. Geez, what the hell happened there? Okay, Y2J is talking about the Wyatts now and he's all "I'm the best in the world at what I do." This may or may not be a reference to Wolverine from the X-Men, but let's just stay in the moment. Jericho says he's going to get old-school crazy on them. The Wyatts talk to Jericho from the Tron and Bray laughs at Y2J's purported badassery. When the house lights come up, Jericho is in the mood to fight but The Miz interrupts the entire milieu by sauntering out to the ring, chatting up Jericho about their last meeting and referring to himself unabashedly as as "The Moneymaker." Y2J responds by clocking Miz in the aforementioned moneymaker and he then steals Miz's sunglasses. Pretty clever. It went from serious to more serious to very serious and then right to frivolous. Break time.
Big E is on the screen after the commercial and he's still speaking in that odd cadence that he picked up somewhere along the line. Looks like he's ready to avenge the sacking of Kofi Kingston by opening up a 2-liter bottle of whoop-ass on the King of Swing. Well, maybe. Cesaro charges Big E and knocks the holy bejeezus out of him as the titans tangle outside the ring. Speaking of rings, there were no rings to signal the beginning of this match so it's all just a barroom brawl without the barroom at this point. Rather than trying to get the guys into the ring to fight, a gaggle of refs come out and restrain Big E as Heyman walks Cesaro up the ramp.
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