TNA IMPACT! Results (4/5) - New Knockouts Champion!

Event: TNA Monday Night iMPACT!
Airdate: Monday, April 5th, 2010 (SpikeTV)
Location: Universal Studios Soundstage 21 in Orlando, FL
Results by 411 Mania

? Opening video package. Highlights the Team Hogan-Team Flair Lockdown feud.

? Tonight we're going to get something called the KnockLock Showdown. Christy Hemme explained the rules but they were kind of confusing. There will be four boxes, one with a spider, one with the Knockouts Title and I missed the other two. They'll probably explain better later in the show.

In walk the Beautiful People, with their belts. They plan on winning three of the four Lockboxes. They say tonight is a night no one will forget.

? Hulk Hogan is out with Abyss and Jeff Jarrett. Tenay reminds us that Abyss named Jeff Jarrett to Team Hogan last week. CALL AND TEXT YOUR FRIENDS, says Mike Tenay.

Hogan says Team Hogan has horsepower. Hulk says the dirtiest player in the game has shown his true colors and the Captain of Team Hogan (cue stupid Abyss scream) will lead Team Hogan into battle. Team Hogan was said a lot during this. Abyss says Flair is a legend with legendary battles but he has never dealt with someone like Abyss. At LockDown, Flair will realize the definition of pain and suffering. Lots of spit on the camera at this point. Abyss says it makes no difference who is on Team Flair because Jeff Jarrett, Abyss and the rest of Team Hogan are going to win.

Ric Flair's music plays and out he comes on his wheelchair. Desmond Wolfe, Sting and Beer Money Inc. join Flair on the stage.

Flair tells everyone to shut up. Flair laughs at Abyss' team and introduces us to his team. He describes Desmond Wolfe but I have no clue what he's saying. He calls Beer Money "bad ass cowboys," and says Sting is an icon. He chants Sting but the crowd drowns him out. Flair calls Chelsea, gives off a "WHOO" and shows off his Hall of Fame ring. He is the Hall of Fame. Flair says he's going to shove his ring down Abyss' throat at LockDown.

Hogan tells Flair to shut up and lets us know we are going to find out Team Hogan when the time is right. Flair says everyone wants to be with the Nature Boy and if there is a problem, Team Flair will get down to the ring right now. Down the ramp they go.

Jeff Jarrett stops everything and tells Sting to get into the ring without his bat. He wants Stinger to answer a question. Sting obliges the request and steps in the ring. WHY STEVE WHY? is basically what Jeff Jarrett asked. He wants to know why Sting decided to let the dark side come out now.

No answer from Sting.

Jarrett says he may not deserve an answer but the people in the Impact Zone do.

Sting doesn't answer so Jarrett slaps him. Sting kicks Jarrett and drops him down with the Scorpion Deathdrop. Sting leaves the ring but Wolfe kills Abyss with Sting's back. Hogan is cornered by Beer Money but Jeff Jarrett and Rob Van Dam come in through the crowd. Beer Money waits while Hardy and Van Dam get into the ring. RVD and Hardy clean house, allowing Abyss to gather himself and take Wolfe out with a big boot.

Rob Van Dam versus James Storm is up after the commercial break.

Match One
Rob Van Dam versus James Storm

We get back to the show with Storm slapping RVD. Van Dam replies with a kick to the face. Van Dam whips him into the turnbuckle and flips him over with a monkey flip. Quick cover gets a two count. In a corner, RVD strikes Storm in the face. Storm reverses a whip but RVD sends him to the outside. Kick to the head forces Storm to the outside. Pose by RVD. Storm catches a baseball slide from Van Dam and sends RVD into the steel barricade. Storm positions RVD on the apron and gets back inside. Rob Van Dam gets to his feet and nails a shoulderblock. Storm goes back and pulls off a Randy Orton rope DDT. Two count.

Storm lifts RVD as Tenay tells us TO CALL AND TEXT OUR FRIENDS AGAIN and delivers a veritical suplex. He covers and gets a two count. Chinlock applied by Cowboy James Storm. Fans will RVD to his feet and he punches his way out of Storm's grasp. RVD bounces off the ropes and reverses a knee into a rollup. Two count. Big spin kick by RVD after. Both men down. They get up and trade blows. RVD catches a Storm punch and delivers three of his own. He punctuates it with a huge kick. Storm gets up with the ropes but RVD catches him with a clothesline. Rolling Thunder by Van Dam. He covers and gets a two count.

RVD catches Storm by the ropes but Storm nails an enziguri. Eye of the Storm from James Storm. He covers and RVD kicks out before the three count. RVD reverses a Storm whip but puts up an elbow when RVD tries to capitalize. RVD blocks a slam and kicks Storm in the face. He slams Storm to the mat and connects with the split-legged moonsault for the win.

WINNER: Rob Van Dam
Solid opening bout. Built to the Lethal LockDown match and didn't hurt anyone.

? Storm nails RVD in the face with a beer bottle after the bout. He smiles as the ref calls for help. Storm tries to take off the medical guys but security escorts him out of the ring. A commercial cuts off Taz mid-sentence

? We return with a replay of James Storm's action. RVD and Storm are still exchanging looks when Jeff Hardy comes out. He nails Storm in the back and brings him to the ring. He throws him out and poses. Enter Robert Roode. He delivers a big Spinebuster to Jeff Hardy. Security tells him to leave and he does.

? Christy Hemme is with Tara, Angelina Love, ODB and Hamada, one team from the KnockLock deal, or whatever it was called. Tara calls it a joke and says she'll do her best to pin someone. Angelina Love shares Tara's thoughts and says there is no fair in wrestling. She says she's going to win the Knockouts Title but Tara scoffs at the premise. Hemme is left with ODB and Hamada. ODB wants the conract so she can go after AJ Styles. Hamada says..something and that ends our segment.

? Homicide is out for his Global Championship match. I wonder who he beat to earn it.

Match Two
Rob Terry versus Homicide
Global Championship Match

A bunch of chops from Homicide start us off. Terry takes him out with a clothesline and chokeslams him off of the top rope. Homicide avoids an attack in the corner and strikes Terry with a bunch of chops. Homicide tries a monkeyflip but Terry shrugs him off. Terry lifts Homicide up for a military press slam and holds up Homicide for 20 seconds or so. Terry lifts Homicide and throws him across the ring (CALL YOUR FRIENDS is said again by Mike Tenay). Homicide throws a strike but Terry no-sells it. Terry tries a powerslam but Homicide squirms out. In the corner, Homicide flies off the ropes and into Terry's arms for the front powerslam. That's all.

WINNER: Rob Terry
I'm glad Tenay let us know Terry was asking for these matches during the bout. Beyond that, the match was pretty dull.

? Homicide strikes Rob Terry after the match. He throws the chair into Terry's head but it does nothing. Terry takes Homicide out with the David Otunga spinebuster and stands tall, he has blood on his head though.

Orlando Jordan is on the stage with some New Orleans-esque mask. He spills lotion all over his chest and eats it. That was all. Odd.

? April 18th is the date of the LockDown PPV, I don't think I've ever typed that.

? Madison Rayne and Velvet Sky are warming up in the back. Lacey Von Erich walks in with a bikini bottom and the ladies swoon over it.

Match Three
Angelina Love, Tara, Hamada and ODB v. The Beautiful People and Daffney
Knockouts LockBox Showdown

So there are four keys or something. A lady wins one whenever she pins someone and is taken out of the match after that. Each key opens up a box. One has a mandatory strip, another has the Knockouts title, the other has Tara's spider and the other has a contract for any title match. I think.

Tara and Rayne start us off. Rayne kicks her way out of a wristlock and wraps her feet around Tara's head. She sends Tara's head into the mat. Rayne climbs the ropes but gets stopped by Tara. Widow's Peak finishes her off. Tara wins the first key.

Daffney runs in and throws Angelina Love into the ring. She stomps on her for a while but we get sent to a commercial.

Velvet Sky and ODB are grappling on the floor. During the break, someone won the key but they won't tell us. We get highlights and learn that Daffney won the key. In the ring. Sky has a headlock applied on ODB. ODB breaks out and sends Sky into the ropes. Big splash. She sends Sky to the mat with a shoulderblock. Another whip from ODB. She misses a clothesline but catches Sky for a fallaway slam. She covers but only gets a one count. ODB strikes Sky on the floor. Sky gets out of an ODB Hold and takes her out with a DDT. She covers and gets a three count. The Key is hers.

Running clothesline by Love to Von Erich. She pounds Von Erich on the mat and takes her to her feet. She sends Von Erich into the ropes but Lacey stops her from attacking. Lacey misses her moonsault elbow drop allowing Love to lift her for the Flatliner deal for the win.

WINNER: Tara, Daffney, Velvet Sky and Angelina Love
Nothing good can be said about the match. Really kind of segmented and the rules were lame.

? We see the lockboxes in the back. We'll get the openings later in the night. Next is Anderson-Angle so we see a video package for their feud.

? Anderson is out first. He doesn't do his grand entrance and everything seems rushed so I'm guessing we're short on time. Match is up after a commercial break.

Match Three
Kurt Angle versus Mr. Anderson
Ladder Match for LockDown key

Match starts with Anderson getting his rolling fireman's carry early. He goes to the outside and grabs himself a ladder. He brings it into the ring as Angle ges to his knees. Anderson and Angle trade blows with Anderson gaining momentum at the end of it. He suplexes Angle into the ladder. Anderson lifts the ladder and centers it. Angle gets up so Anderson puts it against the corner. He punches Angle in the back but Angle recovers and sends Anderson into the ladder with a belly to belly suplex. Angle grabs the ladder and positions it in the center. Anderson gets to his feet so Angle punches him in the head. Anderson reverses an Angle whip and sends the ladder into Kurt Angle. Anderson picks up the ladder and re-positions it in the center. Anderson begins the climb and touches the key. He tries to pull it down but Angle grabs him for the Angle Slam off the ladder.

Angle gets up and kicks Anderson out of the ring. Kurt turns his attention back to the key and slowly climbs the ladder. Angle finally gets to the top but Anderson is there. He pushes the ladder causing Kurt Angle to fall to the outside really ugly. His foot got caught on the rope and he fell ugly. Anderson centers the ladder and begins his slow climb. Angle is stirring by the apron during the climb. Anderson gets to the top and begins working on the key. Angle climbs the turnbuckle and climbs flying with a missile dropkick into the ladder. Wow.

German Suplex by Kurt Angle. Angle tries to pick the ladder up but he sees Anderson stirring. He turns his attention to Anderson and puts Anderson on the ladder. He pounds him the face to make sure he's out and Kurt climbs the turnbuckle. Moonsault from Kurt Angle. After looking like death after that bump to the outside, you have to admire him for doing that.

Angle sends Anderson into the corner pole shoulder first. He picks the ladder up and sets it up in the middle of the ring. Angle climbs as the camera notices Anderson with the Warrior Medal. Anderson stops Kurt from climbing and begins choking him with the Warrior Medal. Angle tries to climb through the choking and gets his fingertips on the key. He tries to pull it down by passes out from the medal. Anderson completes the climb and takes down the key for the win.

WINNER: Mr. Anderson
Solid performance from both men, especially Kurt Angle. I still don't quite understand the major advantage over having the key but it made a solid match so who cares.

? Jeremy Borash is in the back with Hulk Hogan. He says Eric Bischoff may have gone into the business for himself last week. Borash notices Bischoff isn't here and wants to know if Hogan has anything to do with it. Hogan says what happens between Hogan and Bischoff stays between them. Borash tries to get into the story but Bubba the Love Sponge tells him to go away. Hogan is sad at Bubba for joining the Band. Hogan tells Bubba he's running with the wrong crowd and will run into trouble. Bubba says he's having fun and walks off.

Jay Lethal walks in and says he's been doing some thinking. He references the Mega Powers and says they're cool. He has Hogan's back.

? THE BAND walk in and meet up with Bubba the Love Sponge in the back. I'm guessing they're up next. No complaints from me.

? Christy Hemme is in the back with Matt Morgan. He calls himself the TNA Tag Champions. He says Hernandez is out because of an unfortunate in-ring accident. Hemme wants to know who Morgan's partner is and he says she's looking at them. He says "we are going to hold these titles." Hemme is confused. She says the winner of the next match will fight Matt Morgan next week for the tag straps.

? We get highlights of a match between these two teams on an XPlosion taping.

Match Five
Team 3D versus the MotorCity Machine Guns
Number One Contenders Match

Bubba Ray and Chris Sabin start us off. Sabin twists the arm of Ray. Ray rolls out of it and wrenches the arm of Chris Sain. Sabin punches his way out of the hold and kicks Brother Ray. Ray lands a big boot but misses a second one. Sabin gets a quick kick and lands a springboard crossbody block. He tags in Alex Shelley and they do a double team kick. Brother Ray chops Shelley and tags in D-Von. Brother Devon takes Shelley to the mat and lands a diving headbutt. He stops Shelley from making a tag and applies a bearhug. Shelley pokes his way out of the hold but Devon lands an elbow. Shelley stops himself off of a Devon tag and tags in Sabin. Sabin attacks both Debon and Ray. He climbs the turnbuckle and delivers a dropkick to both men. Enziguri to Brother Ray. Double Team kick to Brother Devon. In comes Shelley off the tag with a combination crossbody-neckbreaker. The move gets a two count.

The Guns whip Devon into the ropes but he catches the ropes to stop it. Ray clotheslines both men and takes Shelley to the mat. Whatsup headbutt from Devon. Brother Ray goes and grabs a table. Syxx Pac stops him and sends him into the pole causing a DQ.

WINNER: Team 3D (DQ)
Solid while it lasted. Not sure about the DQ but it keeps the Band looking strong.

? Nash nails Ray with a pair of brass knucks and they take out both teams. Hall brings out the Razor's Edge for Chris Sabin. They stand tall over the two tag teams while Tenay wonders why they performed the attack. Waltman spraypaints something on the back of Alex Shelley and says something into the camera.

? We return to see Waltman chilling on the ringropes. Bubba the Love Sponge comes down to interview the Band. Nash says he has a message to the Impact Zone. They may not be signing the checks, but they are running the show. Nash says Hogan shouldn't be worried about Ric Flair and Eric Bischoff, his worse nightmare is THE BAND~! For fifteen year, THE BAND has been carrying Hulk Hogan. They learned their "bad actions" from Hulk Hogan. They now run the show. Nash says he just needs the two people in the ring to like him. Wolfpac music plays to end the segment. Waltman, Hall and Sponge do some silly movements inside.

? Jeremy Borash is with D'Angelo Dinero. Tonight, Dinero goes one on one with Desmond Wolfe for the thirty-seventh time. Pope says he'll make history at LockDown by becoming the TNA World Heavyweight Champion. Dinero addresses his history with Desmond Wolfe and says tonight will be a new night.

In comes Desmond Wolfe and Chelsea. Wolfe says Pope doesn't deserve the match with him. Wolfe should have Pope's title match and is even willing to wrestle twice in one night. D'Angelo Dinero says Wolfe can have his title shot if he wins tonight. Pope guarantees tonight'll be a whole new match and says he'll pray for Wolfe before the match starts.

? Tara is in the back, fearful of what box she's going to open.

? TNA X Division Champion Doug Williams is in the Impact Zone. So Cal Val gives him a mic on his way to the ring. He asks for a moment of our time. He says the days of the jumped up acrobats are over. He says those clowns need to go back to the circus with the rest of the performing monkeys. He says there is an ultimatum. He says they can go back to wrestling school and learn the art-form that is technical wrestling. Since he is the master of technical wrestling, he wants to be addressed by his full name, Douglass Williams. He has arranged a Gauntlet Match with Generation Me for tonight. He asks for Generation Me to come out.

Match Six
Generation Me v. Douglass Williams

Williams goes one on one with Jeremy Buck. Williams wrenches the arm but Jeremy reverses. Willaims goes to the ropes to break it. Williams monkeyflips Jeremy Buck into the corner but he lands on his feet and performs a moonsault. Williams gets up in the corner and slaps Buck to the mat. He whips Jeremy into the ropes but Buck gets up a boot. Springboard faceplant from Jeremy Buck to Williams. Buck gets Williams to the mat and climbs the ropes. He lands on his feet after a issed rollup. Chaos Theory suplex gets the win for Douglass Williams.

Max Buck comes flying in to start the second part. Buck avoids a clothesline with a flip. Headscissors takedown is followed up with a dropkick. Two count for Buck. Max Buck punches Williams and eventually takes him to the mat. Buck slams Williams' faceinto the corner and whips into the opposite one. He flies with an elbow. Max slams Williams to the mat and connects with a legdrop. Two count. Buck lifts Williams and slaps him down with a chop. Max Buck climbs the corner but Williams kicks the ropes to cause him to fall. Douglass Williams connects with the front choke the get him the win.

WINNER: Douglass Williams
Solid match that looks Williams look fantastic. I hope he keeps the title for a long time.

? Shannon Moore is out and he fights Douglass Williams. He takes him down with a dropkick. He grabs makeup but Williams rolls out to stop him. Moore says the Book of Dilligaf says there is no room for a boring wrestler like Douglass Williams. He wants a title match at LockDown. He welcomes Williams to GlamRock. Millions of people just turned their televisions to Raw or that NCAA Basketball game.

? Christy Hemme is with Brother Ray and Brother Devon who are angry. Ray is mad at the Band and wants them in the ring next week. Devon calls them a cancer to every promotion they've ever been in. Devon says next week, they are going to dominate The Band in the Impact Zone.

? Desmond Wolfe is in the ring for his match with D'Angelo Dinero. Jobber entrance or time constraints? Either way, the Pope is out shortly after.

Match Seven
D'Angelo Dinero v. Desmond Wolfe

Wolfe attacks Dinero on the ramp but Dinero gets the majority of the offense. Pope throws Wolfe into the ring and takes off his entrance gear. Wolfe stops him from entering with a kick. Wolfe elbows Pope on the ropes. Pope kicks Wolfe and follows that up iwth a bunch of chops. Wolfe sweeps Pope to the mat and lifts him up. He takes Pope into the corner and thrusts his arms into Pope's chest. He tries the Tower of London but Pope gets out. Wolfe tries to attack but Pope slips out. Pope slaps Wolfe, taking him to the mat. Pope slides the kneebads down and sets up for the Dinero Express. Codebreaker from the Pope. He covers and gets the win.

WINNER: D'Angelo Dinero
It made Dinero look strong and that's all that matters on the road to LockDown.

? AJ Styles attacks Dinero after the match on the ramp. He clotheslines Pope back into the ring and stomps on him. Styles Clash in the center of the ring. Abyss is out for the save. Styles leaves the ring but Wolfe ambushes Abyss. Abyss takes Wolfe out but Styles is there with a chopblock. Dinero tries to get involved but Styles takes him out. Wolfe brings a fire extinguisher into the ring and nails Abyss in the head with it. A commercial break cuts off Mike Tenay in mid-sentence.

? We're back with Taz talking about Team Flair's domination of Team Hogan tonight. They throw us to Jeremy Borash on the stage and we're going to find out who won what in the LockBoxes deal.

Angelina Love, Tara, Velvet Sky and Daffney are our four women for those of you that forgot.

Lights go down and Velvet Sky opens up a box. Inside is an Open Contract for any opponent, any time, any stipulation.

Tara is up next. Borash explains her conflict (wanting both the spider and the title). He then brings up the possiblity of a Tara striptease. He asks if she's ready and she is. She opens up the box and inside is the spider. She's ecstatic until she realizes she lost her title.

Daffney and Angelina Love are our last two women. One will be the champion while the other will be forced to do a striptease. Borash asks if they are ready and they are. They're going to open them up at the same time. Angelina Love wins the TNA Knockouts Title and Daffney is going to be forced to do a striptease.

She tries to walk away but Borash lets her know she'll be fired if she doesn't. Cheezy music plays and she begins her walk to the ring. She takes her hat off first. She sarcastically plays with it for a while. She slowly continues with her striptease, wasting a ton of time. Lacey Von Erich is out and nails her with the ugly stick. Von Erich takes Daffney's place. On the stage, Angelina Love and Tara begin fighting over the Knockouts Title. They brawl on the ramp for a while until Love kicks Tara into the ring. Lacey continues with her striptease while Love and Tara brawl. Velvet Sky gets on a microphone and says no Beautiful Person upstages another one. Next week Sky is cashing in her contract for a leather and lace match. That ends our show