Total Divas Recap: Big E Dates Natalya's Sister, Daniel Bryan's Toilet, Paige Gets Heat, More
Last week: Nattie went crazy. This week: Daniel gets a new toilet. And goes crazy.
Daniel and Brie are hanging out when Daniel's self-composting toilet arrives. "It holds like a month's worth of poop in there!" Daniel brags. Brie has the same look of defeated dismay of her face as Tyson does whenever Nattie is doing something crazy. I don't think this show is a good advertisement for the institution of marriage, quite frankly.
Speaking of Tyson he seems to be accepting Nattie's sister, Jenni, is probably never moving out. Really, why should she give up living rent-free in a cool mansion to go live in some average apartment? The girl knows a good deal when she sees one. They all go furniture shopping for the new house. Nattie has terrible taste; Jenni somehow manages to have worse. Tyson is at breaking point. His interactions with Jenni remind me of whenever Homer Simpson has to deal with Patty and Selma.
In one of the main plot points of the episode Nattie sets up Big E with Jenni. It works out for a while though it's cooled off a bit by the end. Jenni brags to Nattie about how, uh, "Big" Big E. actually is. Big E. seems like a catch. TJ appears happy at the prospect of finally getting rid of Jenni. In other news: Big E. has the coolest wardrobe ever.
Meanwhile Bryan is so keen on getting everyone to use the toilet, he even cuts off the water so they have no choice but to use it. Well, at least someone is doing something to combat climate change and help the environment. He also complains to Brie about her revealing clothes and insists she starts dressing more conservatively.
I suspect Bryan loves his toilet more than Brie at this point.
In a subplot, Paige is trying to teach Cameron how to wrestle at the WWE performance center. It goes about as well as you'd expect. Cameron is utterly useless. Sara Del Ray looks on with a look of absolute horror, possibly realizing that while WWE sees fit to put this hilariously inept woman on television, she's never going to get called up. Paige ends up getting irate and getting a bit too rough with her. Mark Carrano gets annoyed at her lack of professionalism.
She also gets heat from WWE over a (minor) motorcycle crash. Wrestlers and motorcycles don't mix, honey. Ask Jeff Hardy. Later Road Dogg gives her a scathing lecture and tells her she's risking her career with all this personal stuff. Nikki gives Page a (much softer) talking to later and it seems to get through. How did Nikki become the voice of reason?
So the idea is Paige is in big trouble, but, honestly, compared to what guys like HBK, Orton, the Hardyz and tons of others have gotten up to in the past, the stuff Paige is doing is laughably minor. Heck, the idea of Road Dogg, of all people, being the one who tears into her for her misbehavior is, itself, enough to make irony go hang itself.
The show ends with Bryan successfully managing to control Brie's fashion choices. OK, then. I sort feel like flying Gloria Steinman down to Arizona to give him a talking to. Maybe she can steal his toilet to teach him a lesson.